How do these people survive?

You wonder how people like this can actually exist!

*********************************************************************************

> >>How do these people survive?
> >>
> >> ONE
> >> Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that
>
> >>you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked
> >>for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said
> >>the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only
> >>have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply. "So I can't order a half
> >>dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That's right." So I shook
> >>my head and ordered six McNuggets.
> >>
> >> TWO
> >> I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few
> >>items and the
> >>lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked
> >>up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and
> >>placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the
> >>girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider",
> >>looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not
> >>finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this
> >>is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy
> >>that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the things and
> >>left. She had no clue to what had just happened.
> >>
> >> THREE
> >> A lady at work was seen putting a credit card
>into her
> >>floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to
> >>what she was doing, she said she was shopping on
> >>the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she
> >>was using the ATM "thingy."
> >>
> >> FOUR
> >> I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her
> >>car. &;quot;Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I
> >>should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now
> >>I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant
> >>convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I
> >>dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote
> >>thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I
> >>took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why
> >>don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a
> >>long
> >>walk."
> >>
> >> FIVE
> >>
>Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift.
> >>One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm
> >>almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier
> >>machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took
> >>her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier
> >>and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.
> >>
> >> SIX
> >> A large motor home was towed into a car dealership a while
> >>ago. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the
> >>whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." When the
> >>manager was asked what had happened. He said that the driver had
> >>set the
> >>"cruise
>control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
> >>
> >> SEVEN
> >> My neighbor works in the operations department in the
> >>central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him
> >>when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a
> >>call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question:
> >>"I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys
> >>have a fire downtown?"
> >>
> >> EIGHT
> >> Police in Radnor, Pa., interrogated a suspect by placing a
> >>metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a
> >>photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was
>placed in the
> >>copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they
> >>thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie
> >>detector" was working, the suspect confessed.
> >>
> >> NINE
> >> A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if
> >>she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating
> >>ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and
> >>should be fine, the mother says, I just gave him some ant
> >>killer..... Dispatcher: Rush him to emergency!